NO BUT REALLY

Guys, when did I become someone who writes AUs? I never write AUs! And yet clearly I have planted myself firmly in AU-land for the XMFC fandom.

So pocky_slash link to this Damn, Your Fandom Is Good At What You Do Fest, and, being trapped in the hellish depths of tech week, of course, of course, now I feel a burning desire to write a Take Your Fandom To Work fic where Hellfire Theater Club is heading into tech for "Children of the Atom", the horrible new post-apocalyptic drama written and directed by Sebastian Shaw, who's also the artistic director of the theater, which is like the clusterfuck to end all clusterfucks.

Charles is the stage manager, who is preternaturally talented at remaining calm in a crisis and can like read people's minds and somehow keeps the actors from staging a coup and strangling their director with their bare hands. Sean is Charles's hapless ASM straight out of undergrad, this is his first professional show and he's squirrely as all get-out and smokes a LOT of weed to cope with Shaw's tyrannical demands. Darwin is the super-chill set designer who adapts his designs to the ever-shifting demands of the staging. Erik is the technical director, and he fucking hates everybody and this stupid set and the specs keep changing on a daily basis because Shaw keeps changing his fucking mind. Alex is Erik's master carpenter, who is much better at striking sets than building them, and Erik is constantly berating him. Moira is the super-competent production manager who keeps shit moving on something resembling a schedule. Janos is the sleek bitchy gay costume designer, Angel is the super-creative propsmaster, Azazel's the fight choreographer, Hank is stuck doing double duty as both lighting and sound designer, and he's brilliant, okay, but seriously, how do they not have a separate budget for sound? (Or maybe Sean's the sound designer, but I am deeply amused by the thought of him as ASM.) Raven's the lead actress and it's all her fault Charles got dragged into this shitshow. Emma's the chief drama critic at [local major newspaper] whom everyone sucks up to in the hopes of a good review.

There is no plot. Or, the plot is surviving until fucking opening. Oh god I need to not write this, no one else should be subjected to the comedy of errors that is my life.