i am the biggest idiot on the planet.

All I have been trying to do for freaking months is to see the musical "Hamilton" at the Public Theater. Tickets were extravagantly expensive (for my budget), so I'd originally assumed I'd just have to wistfully give it a pass. But then azewewish was going to be in town early in April and had specifically bought a ticket to Hamilton, so I said FUCK IT, I'm going too. This was back in February. I ponied up the cash and bought a ticket.

Three days later, I found out that a show I was working on was going to change its performance day and time...to the exact date and time for my Hamilton ticket. I thought, okay, no big deal, so I'll exchange it for a different show. They announced an extension for the run, so I called the box office to exchange the ticket. And it was already 100% sold out, no way no how no exchange or refund. I raged, I cried, and then I gave it up for lost and starting asking around to find a friend willing to buy it off me so that I could at least get part of the money back. I found one. Then, miraculously, a friend who'd managed to score one of the extension tickets told me she'd be willing to swap with me. Huzzah! It was a pain in the ass finding a time we were both available to physically swap tickets, but we did and she saw it and loved it. I have been ramping up my excitement about this show for MONTHS now. And today was the day. Super excited. Planning my whole day around it.

I just double-checked the ticket to see what time the evening show started. Guess what? It was a matinee. I missed it. This whole time, since I'd originally bought a Saturday evening ticket, I'd somehow thought that was the one I'd swapped for, too. I'd glanced at it when I got it, but misread the 1pm as 7pm because that was what I was expecting to see. And then I tucked it away someplace safe so that it would be ready and waiting for me, and I FUCKING MISSED IT.

I have no one to blame but myself. I am the biggest fucking idiot in the world. I've never done anything like this before in my life -- I'm the super anal person who triple-checks everything and is always on time. But I just...totally convinced myself that this ticket was for the evening, not afternoon. And...that's it. It's not even about the money. It's that I've been SO EXCITED, and I totally screwed myself over, and now I just feel like an asshole.

So, "Hamilton." I hear it's a good show. On the plus side, it is transferring to Broadway, so I can still see it, just...not now.